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A Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater screenshot.
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Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater review: as great as it was in 2004, just don’t expect anything new

by admin August 22, 2025



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Konami’s 2004 stealth classic Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater is one of the best games ever made. Yet the idea of a remake didn’t exactly conjure the joy that one would usually get from hearing their favourite game is getting remade. After the fallout between Konami and series creator Hideo Kojima and the 10-year series hiatus that ensued (not counting the dreadful Metal Gear Survive), I had my doubts.

Review info

Platform reviewed: PS5 Pro
Available on: Xbox Series X, Xbox Series S, PS5, PC
Release date: August 29, 2025

And yet, Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater is fantastic; there are no awkward changes to the story or pacing like the Silent Hill 2 remake, or really any attempts to touch the game I love so much… because it is still that game.

Metal Gear Solid Delta is firmly in the Dead Rising Deluxe Remaster or The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening camp of remakes as it is so beholden to the source material that it struggles to find an identity of its own outside of the fact that it looks pretty now.

Remember the Alamo

(Image credit: Konami)

Snake Eater represents the earliest point in the Metal Gear timeline, in which you play as Naked Snake before he goes on to become the legendary soldier Big Boss in the midst of the Cold War. A rescue mission gone wrong means he has to battle his mentor, The Boss, destroy the not-quite-a-Metal-Gear, Shagohod robot, and prevent the Cold War from becoming a hot one.

Naked Snake is by far the most compelling protagonist in the series, by the sheer virtue of being the most relatable. Both Solid Snake and Raiden were bred to be the greatest possible soldiers, while Naked Snake is just a guy.

Early on you see him pull a stupid grin because he realises he can drop a beehive on someone; he completely blanks out sleeper agent Eva’s advances because he’s so enamoured with the cool gun she gave him. These little touches make him a far more compelling character and allow for the finale to deliver an absolute gut punch at its emotional climax.

(Image credit: Konami)

Your main adversaries this time are the Cobra unit, a group of legendary soldiers like one who shoots bees out of his mouth or the sniper who is 100 years old and can die of old age if you save the game during his fight and come back later.

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Then there’s the main antagonistic trio of Snake’s mentor, The Boss; series staple Revolver Ocelot in his awkward early years; and Volgin, a sadistic colonel who is as filled with pomp as he is an abhorrent human being.

There really isn’t a character in Snake Eater that feels underdeveloped. I’m not typically a big audio log person, but I found myself returning to the codec call screen to chat with Snake’s allies – even after beating the game many times before now – just because I love the banter between them.

There are even characters who appear for literally one scene – like the Soviet scientist Aleksandr Granin – and are unforgettable thanks to Kojima’s signature monologue and exposition sequences.

The mission, or your beliefs?

(Image credit: Konami)

Snake Eater moved the series away from its then-standard military base infiltrations – where stealth was more straightforward – and moved into the Russian jungles. Now that you’re dealing with foliage, caves, mountains, and the odd encampment, stealth is very freeform.

In Metal Gear Solid Delta, it’s all pretty much how you remember it, the only difference being that the game’s control scheme has been updated to be more in line with later entries in the series. It introduces the over-the-shoulder camera and crouch-walk from Metal Gear Solid 4 (which was implemented into the 3DS version of Snake Eater) and makes the controls more in line with a standard third-person shooter (triggers to aim and shoot, circle to crouch etc.). But you shouldn’t expect something revolutionary.

Snake Eater’s other major addition was that of survival mechanics. You could change camo to help you blend into environments, eat food (including snakes, funnily enough) to keep your stamina up, and heal various injuries and ailments. In the original these were accessed through the pause menu, but while that’s still the case, this time it’s been streamlined somewhat.

Holding up on the d-pad will open up a camo menu for you, showing some combinations that you can switch to in an instant; when you’re injured, pressing up will take you straight to the cure screen too. Again, it’s nothing transformative, but it’s a nice quality of life update. You also get an autosave every time you enter a new area, which makes doing the hardest challenge run – Foxhound rank – less obnoxious.

Best bit

(Image credit: Konami)

Snake Eater is a game filled to the brim with memorable moments, but the updated visual fidelity and foliage really add to the intensity of the sniper battle with The End. What was already one of the best boss battles in the series gets a boost from it being even harder to find your opponent.

But Metal Gear Solid Delta isn’t really doing anything new. All of the level layouts, enemy placement and items are the exact same as they were on the PS2. It’s so strictly beholden to the original that you can interrogate guards, and they will still give you codes to use in the PSP’s Metal Gear Acid, which isn’t even a game you can buy officially anymore. Plus the opening and closing credits are ripped straight from the original (a lot of Hideo Kojima name drops), with you having to go into the extras menu to actually see the new development team.

Granted, it does bring back some of the things I would not expect, including things that were taken out of later re-releases like the Snake Vs Monkey mode, which isn’t as fantastic as the other half of that Metal Gear x Ape Escape crossover, but it’s a fun little distraction.

Plus, there’s a “Legacy Mode” option that lets you revert to the original control scheme complete with fixed cameras, a visual filter, and the old versions of the opening theme and main menu.

Kuwabara kuwabara

(Image credit: Konami)

The other major change with Metal Gear Solid Delta is how it looks, with the Russian jungle rendered beautifully in Unreal Engine 5, and I really can’t fault it on that front. The character models do present an issue, though. On paper they look great, and some characters really take to the new style – like Volgin, whose facial scarring looks much better and more identifiable with the new tech. But others like Ocelot and The Boss, look somewhat uncanny at points, with their faces feeling off at certain angles.

This is paired with Metal Gear Solid Delta using the original voice recordings from Metal Gear Solid 3 with only minor new lines recorded to cover for the different control scheme and a couple of easter eggs during codec calls. Metal Gear voice acting is always quite over the top, and as such feels a little weird coming out of the mouths of these hyper realistic character models.

Metal Gear Solid Delta is in a weird spot. I don’t think a massive overhaul like the Resident Evil remakes would have gone down well in a post-Kojima release, so I get why Konami remade it this way (and frankly it’s probably the way I wanted to see it remade). But, at the same time, I don’t really get a sense of what the series looks like going forward like I could with the Silent Hill 2 remake because it is so faithful.

But regardless, it’s still a remake that feels great to play and (mostly) looks fantastic. It doesn’t do much to carve out its own unique identity, but as an entire package Metal Gear Solid Delta is as much of a masterpiece as the original Snake Eater was in 2004.

Play it if…

Don’t play it if…

Accessibility

Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater features a number of accessibility options.

The majority of these are control-based allowing you to swap held inputs into tap. For example, when dragging an enemy, you typically would have to hold the button the entire time, but you have the option now to tap once to grab and tap again to let go.

There are also in-depth subtitle options allowing you to choose sizes, backgrounds, and speaker names with separate options for gameplay and cutscenes. There are colourblind filters present, but these are specifically for the UI and don’t seem to have any effect in-game.

(Image credit: Konami)

I played 30 hours of Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater on PS5 Pro on a Samsung Q60D TV and a Samsung HW-T450 soundbar.

During this time I completed a 16 hour run of the game on Normal in the New Style with the majority of hidden items and weapons collected, defeated every enemy and boss non-lethally, attained the Tsuchinoko rank, and learnt the parry timing of the final boss the hard way.

I also completed the Virtuous Mission in Legacy mode on Hard and completed the New Game+ on Extreme, attaining the Foxhound Rank which is the toughest challenge in the game – made a bit less extreme thanks to autosaves.

First reviewed August 2025



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August 22, 2025 0 comments
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Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater Review - No Going Back
Game Reviews

Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater Review – No Going Back

by admin August 22, 2025


Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater is a PlayStation 2 classic in a way not many games from that era are. Few games from that generation continue to hold up graphically, narratively, and remain fun to play. Metal Gear Solid 3 is still impressive to look at and play, even in 2025, which is a testament to Hideo Kojima and the team that created and released it in 2004. I never thought it needed a remake, but now that it’s here, I’m not sure I will ever be able to go back to the original versions.

Watch Our Metal Gear Solid Delta Review:

 

As Konami grapples with what to do with Metal Gear without its creator, the decision to specifically revisit Snake Eater makes sense. Along with ranking as a favorite among series fans (myself among them), it is also the first in the broader storyline. It has always been my recommendation for anyone looking to dive into the dense but engaging story, and this version will now be my recommendation moving forward.

My biggest fear with the remake was that without Kojima’s involvement, the game would lack a soul, an admittedly impossible-to-define element. However, because the game is such a direct adaptation of the original with only a handful of understandable changes, that element of the game came over just fine in the copy/paste/improve process. Even without the original creator’s involvement, the fact that it came from a team with such a specific and expertly executed idea and point of view remains intact. Decisions like not re-recording the dialogue (as they did for the GameCube remake of Metal Gear Solid, Twin Snakes) and keeping all of its strange bonuses and secrets (Snake can still have a nightmare), all add up to Delta feeling as compelling as it did in 2004, which is a feat. The few changes that were made, however, are smart.

Visually, the team at Konami has fully brought the game up to contemporary standards. Snake looks amazing, and you can see every scar from every battle on his exhausted face. The jungle, in particular, with its dense foliage and various animals, looks terrific. And though no element of the cinematography or cutscene choreography has been changed, it is filled with renewed life thanks to all the heightened detail and new lighting. Later sections of the game, when you are spending more time in plain military buildings than outdoors, lack the impressive pop of those early moments, but they still look fantastic.

You can use the original controls if you desire, but the new standard controls make Snake move and shoot more like a modern third-person shooter. It took some getting used to, and early in my playthrough, I would panic when I got caught, and muscle memory would make me press the wrong buttons, but I can’t imagine ever going back to the way things were. I was popping off tranquilizer headshots quickly and efficiently and having a good time doing it. Quick-changing camo with shortcut keys is also a godsend and finally fixes an element of the game that has always annoyed me.

One place where Delta’s age does show is in its writing. Don’t get me wrong – it has been years since I played without skipping most cutscenes. For this playthrough I remained fully and consistently engaged with the characters and the story’s direction. The Boss’ journey has always been the highlight of Snake Eater, and I appreciated it all the more playing the remake.

But there are moments where you just have to suspend disbelief. Why wouldn’t they take Snake’s radio when they put him in jail? Why do they let Tatyana, their prisoner, more or less come and go as she pleases? In one moment, antagonist Volgin literally says, “Very well. I’ll explain it before I kill you,” before settling into an extended and frankly absurd monologue doing precisely what he promised. It also takes entirely too long for the game to start. As a longtime fan of Snake Eater, I find these elements charming and even comedic, but I completely understand if a newcomer gets frustrated by the excessive and frequently self-indulgent character lectures.

 

Metal Gear Solid Delta makes the case for its existence quickly. It smartly adheres to what made the original game great with evident reverence and makes updates only to the most crucial elements. For fans like me, it colors Snake Eater in a new light and elevates it to something better than I remembered. It’s impossible for me to objectively imagine this being my first experience with Snake Eater, but I am extra excited for those players who have always been curious about Metal Gear for this to be their starting line.



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August 22, 2025 0 comments
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Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater review
Game Updates

Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater review

by admin August 22, 2025


Remaking a classic video game for modern audiences is always a sketchy ordeal. Bringing forward decades-old gameplay and storytelling must be handled with care, but you also have to offer something different to set it apart from the original.

As a very dedicated, long-time fan of the series, I’m pleased to say Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater is everything a remake should be. It remains true to the original in basically every single way, while offering enhanced visuals and a better take on gameplay than what was offered 21 years ago, making it feel like a new and complete package.

What a thrill

Screenshot by Destructoid

MGS Delta is, by and large, 2004’s Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater rebuilt in Unreal Engine 5 with the same exact voice acting, cutscenes, and music that helped make it an all-time great single-player stealth action game. That’s a good thing.

Some may be turned off by the fact that the cutscenes are one-to-one recreations with a gorgeous coat of modern-day paint, but I love it. Over the course of two decades, I have played or watched playthroughs of MGS3 several dozen times. I know these songs and scenes by heart, and this is the same game, but way, way prettier.

The innovation in MGS Delta comes in the gameplay, which is remade through a new control scheme and over-the-shoulder camera angle for Snake in his 1960s spy-thriller adventure. It makes the game more accessible than, say, the HD Collection version of MGS3, which was re-released recently, featuring some dated controls from the PS2 game.

Other than that, MGS Delta is a dream for fans of the franchise. After creator Hideo Kojima’s departure from Konami 10 years ago, we’ve been left to wonder where the MGS franchise was headed. This remake was handled with care from the ground up, and it’s present in every facet of the title. Konami didn’t try to reinvent anything from Kojima’s original vision other than gameplay systems that have become unwieldy over time.

Outside of a few framerate hiccups on the base PS5 (I played on both PS5 and PS5 Pro, the latter of which is a spectacle to look at on a large 4K screen), the game runs smoothly. It plays well, too, apart from Snake’s movement sometimes feeling clunky or sluggish. For example, Snake contextually sticks to nearby walls, rather than when holding a direction on the analog stick like in the original. This is one of the game’s few misses.

Screenshot by Destructoid

Make no mistake, though, MGS Delta is stunningly gorgeous. I damn near broke the Share button on my PS5 controller, screenshotting everything from mid-gameplay vistas to iconic cutscene shots recreated in UE5. It’s an absolute joy to watch and witness, with special attention given to the game’s lighting effects, which are some of the best I’ve seen.

With the new engine, Snake and the various memorable characters are all brought to new life with more details in their expressions and models than ever before, down to every single hair on Snake’s beard or weird wound on Colonel Volgin’s face.

Some days, you feed on a tree frog

Screenshot by Destructoid

I’m really excited for a new generation of gamers to re-live MGS3 and all of its fun boss battles, intense action sequences, silly quirks, and heartbreaking ending. So many gamers have no idea what’s in store for them, and I can’t wait to see the reactions. And just like the original, MGS3 remains a good entry point for the franchise. 

I generally recommend playing the series in release order, but you can easily play this game without any prior knowledge and experience it as a standalone title that could hook you on the rest, and I think that’s what Konami may have in mind with this release.

Every Easter egg from the original is here, including mid-cutscene button presses that allow you to see through Snake’s POV, looking at everything from ghoulish spectres in the background to EVA’s cleavage up close. Yeah, this is the same exact game I grew up with, and it’s still just plain wonderful.

Plus, with this new and powerful graphics engine, the Russian jungle of MGS3 is more detailed than ever. Leaves and dirt kick up when Snake rolls through, mud cakes on his sneaking suit and stays there through cutscenes, and the forest is absolutely teeming with wildlife.

There’s a solid amount of replayability here, too. The game logs everything you collect, including every weapon, item, camouflage, facepaint, and animal you eat, so completionists may feast. There’s also special mini-game modes Snake vs. Monkey or Snake vs. Bomberman (depending on the platform you play on), and a prop hunt-like multiplayer mode coming after launch. 

There’s also inevitable replay value in playing and re-playing the game in either the new, over-the-shoulder perspective or with the classic legacy camera, although I think the latter does not feel quite right with the new control scheme.

Screenshot by Destructoid

One other minor difference I must mention is the classic “Snake Eater” theme song by Cynthia Harrell has been re-recorded for this version of the game. The opening title sequence has been re-done, too. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing; it just stands out from the rest of the remake that’s so dutifully recreated.

Regardless, I will be diving back into MGS Delta for several playthroughs and live streams to re-experience these classic scenes, battles, and moments all over again for a long time to come, while also hunting down every Kerotan frog and GA-KO duck in the wilderness. Welcome back, MGS.

9.5

Superb

A hallmark of excellence. There may be flaws, but they are negligible and won’t cause massive damage.

MGS Delta is a must-play for series veterans and newcomers alike. With it, Konami has taken one of gaming’s greatest achievements and respectfully recreated it with little interference other than gorgeous new visuals and a modern-day control scheme to make it more accessible to everyone.

Pros

  • An all-time classic respectfully reborn
  • Stunning visuals of a Kojima masterpiece reimagined beautifully with modern tech
  • Refined, modernized control scheme
  • Same exact epic voice acting and music as the original
  • Extra modes and multiple kinds of playthroughs add fun and longevity

Cons

  • Snake’s movement feels clunky and slow
  • Legacy camera takes some getting used to with new control scheme
  • Minor performance issues on base PS5
  • Over-the-shoulder perspective feels claustrophobic at times

A copy of this game was provided by the publisher for review. Reviewed on PS5 and PS5 Pro.

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August 22, 2025 0 comments
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Chris Tilly
Esports

The Thursday Murder Club review: Starry cast makes this the Avengers of ageing sleuths

by admin August 22, 2025



The Thursday Murder Club is a movie mystery that’s perfect for armchair detectives who like their crime cozy and their comedy broad.

Published in September 2020, The Thursday Murder Club was TV presenter Richard Osman’s debut novel, and it quickly became a sensation.

The book flew off shelves, sequels followed – as did an acclaimed radio adaptation – and now the movie version has arrived courtesy of Netflix.

Home Alone helmer Chris Columbus directs, while the cast is filled with the best pensioners money can buy; a cavalcade of stars clearly having a ball bringing Osman’s weird and wonderful characters to life.

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What’s The Thursday Murder Club about?

Netflix

The Thursday Murder Club is set in a beautiful retirement community called Cooper’s Chase, where the sun always shines, and there’s everything a retiree could want, from support llamas, archery classes, and a jigsaw room, to life drawing lessons that feature hot men with their tops off.

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It’s idyllic and quaint beyond belief, but every Thursday, a group of residents commandeer said jigsaw room, and investigate cold cases from the past.

They start with an unsolved 1973 mystery concerning “the woman in white who fell out of a window.” But then murder rears its head in the present, via a fresh mystery involving dodgy businessmen and even dodgier gangsters, as well as the ownership of Cooper’s Chase itself.

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So using age and experience to their advantage – plus a healthy dose of cunning, and less healthy slices of cake – the Thursday Murder Club set about solving the case and saving their home.

Who is in the club?

NetflixRichard Osman flanked his Thursday Murder Club cast.

Each member of the Thursday Murder Club possesses a different and very specific set of skills, making them a bit like the Avengers of elderly sleuths, or a geriatric Justice League.

Helen Mirren is Elizabeth, the group’s leader, who very possibly worked as a government spy. Ben Kingsley is Ibrahim, a former psychiatrist who is usually the smartest person in the room. While Pierce Brosnan is Ron, a retired trade union leader who’s as tough as nails.

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They’re an investigative trio at the start of the movie, and our way into the story is through Celia Imrie’s Joyce, a former nurse who is new to Cooper’s Chase, and whom the club brings onboard for her medical expertise.

Brosnan’s dodgy cockney accent aside – the second time he’s offended our ears following the MobLand debacle – the Thursday Murder Club is cast well, and make a winning team when working together.

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But it’s Mirren who delivers the standout performance, not when she’s barking orders at her crew or the local constabulary, but rather when Elizabeth is with husband Stephen (Jonathan Pryce), who suffers from dementia. Played to perfection by the pair, their touching scenes are both heartwarming and heartbreaking.

Pierce Brosnan and Daniel Mays bring the biggest laughs

NetflixNaomie Ackie and Daniel Mays play police officers.

But while there are sad moments spread throughout the movie, they’re outnumbered by some big laughs.

Accent notwithstanding, Brosnan gets some of the biggest, most notably when he’s glimpsed exercising with old dears in the pool, but also when scruffy Ron is fooling the coppers, or smart Ron is giving them a dressing down in his wedding suit.

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Other highlights including a cracking Queen Elizabeth II gag, a funny sequence involving the drinking of gin on a bus, and a shocker concerning the aforementioned life drawing that needs to be seen to be believed.

The movie also mines mirth from local coppers being outthought and outwitted by the TMC, with Daniel Mays hilarious as the increasingly confused and frustrated DCI Hughes.

Is The Thursday Murder Club good?

Netflix

The Thursday Murder Clubs is a solid murder-mystery that keeps you guessing until the final few reels, while Katy Brand and Suzanne Heathcoate’s tight script ensures that the 118 minute run-time flies by.

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There’s the odd contrivance, involving a dictaphone, bunches of flowers, and an awkward boxing pose. While it gets a little heavy-handed at times, through literal blood on a character’s hands, and a sexism sub-plot that feels tacked on.

But the jokes come thick and fast, while the movie’s best scenes happen in the quieter periods, when touching on more serious themes of loneliness, ill health, and the indignities of old age.

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They’re fleeting moments, handled with sensitivity by Columbus and his cast, and they might just leave you with something in your eye when the credits roll.

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The Thursday Murder Club score: 4/5

The Thursday Murder Club is twee beyond belief, but it’s also a faithful adaptation of Richard Osman’s novel; one that delivers the requisite murder and mystery, as well as laughter and the odd tear.

The Thursday Murder Club hits Netflix on August 28, 2025, while you can head here for more of the best thrillers on the streamer.



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August 22, 2025 0 comments
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Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater Review - You're Pretty Good
Game Reviews

Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater Review – You’re Pretty Good

by admin August 22, 2025



There’s a good chance that, at some point in your life, you’ve been so enamored of a piece of media that you’ve considered what it’d be like to experience it for the first time again. Watching Terminator 2, hearing Enter the Wu-Tang, and reading The Dark Knight Returns shaped who I am and, as a result, I remember the moments I experienced them with crystal clarity. Over time, however, those memories have become divorced from the emotions they stirred and what’s left in their place is a longing for those lost feelings.

Video games are the only medium that I think are capable of making that first-time-again fantasy a reality–or as close to one as we’re going to get. Time puts distance between us and the emotionally significant moments we cherish, but it also brings us closer to exciting technologies that can make the old feel new. In the right hands, those technologies can create opportunities to stoke those profound emotions again, even if it’s just a little. Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater does exactly that.

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Now Playing: Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater Review

Before getting into what’s new, what can’t be overlooked in making Delta such a good game is the fact that Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater remains a compelling, well-told story that has strong characterization and deals with some heavy subject matter. It approaches this with a strange mixture of self-seriousness and complete irreverence that is uniquely Metal Gear Solid and, for my money, balances both parts better than any other entry in the series. The stellar stealth is supported by systems that feed into the fantasy of surviving in the jungle and braving the elements, whether that be hunting for food or patching yourself up after sustaining injuries. Delta replicates it and, in my opinion, is better for it. The excellent work that the original Metal Gear Solid 3 dev team did remains the heart and soul of Delta, and it continues to shine.

Visual changes are the most noticeable contributor to elevating MGS3. While its fresh coat may have been painted on in the most clinical manner possible, that shouldn’t take away from the fact that it makes Metal Gear Solid 3–a third-person stealth-action game about sneaking through jungles, taking out soldiers, and uncovering vast, interlocking Cold War conspiracies–feel alive again.

What impressed me in the original PlayStation 2 release was how the jungle felt like it was teeming with life: numerous species of frogs hop about, snakes slither through grass, the distant sounds of birds, and the too-close buzz of agitated bees, not to mention thickets so dense that I felt like I was lost in an open-world as opposed to being deftly guided through a linear one. After years and countless playthroughs, the child-like wonder it initially inspired faded away, but Delta restores it using the brute force power of the Unreal Engine.

Delta looks absolutely stunning–jaw-dropping at times. In the jungle areas, the environments have the vibrancy and life that you’d expect to come from the naturality of green grass, towering trees, thick mud, decaying bricks, and worn wood, but it never feels artificial and, in fact, feels like it makes good on the Cold War-era, Soviet Union-set vibe in the same way the original did. I have no doubt that there will be discussions about the game’s visuals looking like a dispassionate implementation of Unreal Engine. Despite the fact that games like Fortnite prove it’s a misnomer at this point, Delta at times can look like it has the muted, greyish, brownish industrial footprint that people criticize the Unreal Engine for. But upon closer inspection of both individual details and how all of it coalesces, it becomes evident that skilled artists with a clear vision and direction have poured time and effort into elevating Delta above that.

The Unreal Engine sheen is replaced with touches that come together to give authenticity to the muddy floors, wet stone walls, and metal rusted-looking enough that you worry about Snake getting tetanus. And much of that is reflected on the character models too. Snake’s body–whether you’re wearing clothes or not–will pick up the dirt and grime of whatever he comes into contact with; sometimes even foliage in the environment will stick to him. In a similar fashion, damage is accurately represented on his body and can lead to scars or marks becoming visible. Counterintuitively, playing the game so that you rarely take damage robs you of the opportunity to see this impressive level of detail.

Nevertheless, the takeaway here is that there has undoubtedly been a great deal of work put into the character models. Every single character in the game, from key players like Snake, Eva, Ocelot, and Volgin to less present ones like Sokolov and Granin, or the rank-and-file GRU and Ocelot Unit soldiers, look intricately detailed and, I daresay, lifelike at times. Original MGS3 director Hideo Kojima’s flare for cinematic framing benefits from the new visuals since there are a number of up-close shots of faces or slow-motion movements to intensify action sequences. If you didn’t know that this is exactly how it was in the original, you’d think that Konami was doing all this to show off how good the graphics are in Delta.

If you’re a Metal Gear Solid fan, you’ll be aware of the infamous pachinko machine that gave us a look at The Boss rendered with a level of detail we’d never seen her in before. That elicited a fan response that I’m willing to bet was a factor in getting this remake off the ground–Delta betters that by a considerable margin. The character models look improved and, in particular, the lighting is spectacular. The game takes Snake through a variety of different times of day and cycles through different types of weather, and it’s genuinely impressive how the terrain is impacted and how the overall atmosphere and feel changes. Stepping out into the open in broad daylight when the sun is bearing down left me feeling exposed and desperate to quickly throw myself into nearby grass or behind a wall to cut off sightlines. Sneaking through a jungle at night, with surroundings illuminated only by moonlight and the threat of soldiers suddenly popping up because of limited visibility, was tense, even though I had a good memory of enemy locations and patrol patterns. When the game moves to internal locations such as labs and enemy bases, things become a little less interesting, but still impressive in their visual fidelity. It’s just that, next to the jungle, the interior environments provide fewer opportunities to be wowed as they’re more uniform and predictable.

There are so many details that I want to talk about in Delta, but getting to see just how thorough Konami has been with the visual overhaul is genuinely one of the joys of playing the game. Seeing micromovements of The Fear’s eyes accentuated his reptilian, animalistic nature; Snake’s reflection in The Fury’s glass helmet as he begins his fiery climactic ascent gave me a new level of appreciation for a lot of the character work that Kojima and the team did on the PS2, and there are instances of these kinds of details in every scene. What the limitations of old hardware left to the imagination, the power of modern technology now depicts in glorious detail.

Visuals have taken up the vast majority of this review, and for good reason. Not just because it’s where the most work has been done, but also because, for longtime fans, they’re what is going to be most impactful–those are the people that I think will have the strongest response to what they’re seeing and playing. A great deal of appreciation for what Delta achieves comes from my intimate familiarity with Metal Gear Solid 3–I have played this game so many times that every screen of it is burned into my mind, so seeing what I’m so familiar with but with a level of detail that was simply impossible in the 2000s and, by modern standards, is best-in-class, was often arresting. I’m sure that almost everyone can objectively agree that Delta looks great, but for people like me, the effect of and appreciation for the new visuals goes far beyond. Metal Gear Solid has never looked this good.

What’s more uniformly appreciable for everyone, however, is the new control scheme and the gameplay tweaks implemented to accommodate them. A big part of modernizing MGS3 has been switching to smoother movement and aiming. For the former, Konami has implemented animations and transitions that bring the game closer to the fluidity of Metal Gear Solid 5. Instead of jarringly switching from standing to crouching and then crawling, Snake now naturally moves between the different states and can transition while in motion, which makes navigating environments while using obstacles and hiding opportunities frictionless. Similarly, the way Snake moves his body when laying down and aiming is smooth. It’s not quite as robust as what you can do in MGS5 and crawling can sometimes still feel a bit unwieldy, but it’s vastly improved to the point where it shouldn’t be a stumbling block for anyone new, as it would be if you fired up the original version.

Complementing the freer and more fluid movement is a tighter viewpoint that brings the camera close to Snake, adopting the familiar over-the-shoulder perspective for aiming in third-person. This means you can be far more precise with shots, since Snake, his aiming trajectory, and what you’re aiming at are always in view. Those who haven’t played it may be shocked to hear that wasn’t the case in the original, which had a restricted isometric viewpoint and then more of a controllable camera in the Subsistence version. In both cases, it made for some awkward gameplay moments.

The one trade-off with all this is the fact that this Snake’s newfound efficiency in movement and proficiency with firearms does trivialize a lot of the boss fights, which make up the bulk of the coolest parts of the game. If you’re new to the game, you’ll still find they present a good challenge since each one has quirks that need to be figured out. However, if you know what you’re doing, you can tear through them very quickly. It doesn’t feel like I was able to dispatch them considerably faster than I could if I tried on the PS2 today, but being able to see more, get around more easily, and shoot better means that members of The Cobra Unit feel even more like pushovers now. That is, except for The End; that old geezer is still a geriatric menace.

Delta isn’t completely free of issues. Alongside the new perspective, there is a cover system that has a certain stickiness to it that can be frustrating. It’s not quite the Gears of War glued-to-the-wall level, but more of a gravitational pull towards walls, particularly the corners. That meant that I would accidentally snap into cover when I didn’t intend to, particularly in smaller rooms where the camera is close and there are boxes around Snake. On the one hand, intentionally going into corner cover is appealing since it’s much easier to pop out and fire a shot off with the new over-the-shoulder aiming system, but on the other, I didn’t find myself using that method very much since I could now reliably shoot from the hip or quickly swap into first-person mode and fire off a shot, so all in all, the system ends up getting in the way for me.

When it comes to the other new additions, for the most part they make sense and don’t drastically alter the gameplay experience, instead enhancing it. One is the introduction of a specific button that can be held to enter into a stalking mode that slows Snake’s movements down and makes him much quieter. It can be used when walking, crouch-walking, or crawling. Think of it as the slow-walk that you’d get from tilting the analog stick on the PS2 slightly. Initially, I didn’t really understand why this was necessary and felt it wasn’t that useful since it was so slow. But then I realized it was crucial if you want to sneak up on an enemy to hold them up or get them in a CQC move. The enemies in Delta have better awareness and perception, so if you slow walk or crouch walk behind a soldier without holding the stalking button, they will hear Snake and chaos will quickly erupt. Truthfully, I never got comfortable with getting up close to the extent that I relied on it as a frequent method of engagement like I would in the original; it felt far more risky, which meant when I was attempting a grab or hold-up, I felt more stressed out than I expected. I haven’t felt my palms get sweaty while playing MGS3 in many years, but I was wiping my hands on my pants frequently while playing Delta.

Enemies can now see much farther and have better awareness of what is above or below them. I was surprised to find that I aroused suspicions from positions that I know for sure are safe in the original game, so veterans shouldn’t underestimate soldiers in Delta–they’ve got some new tricks up their sleeves. On top of that, some of the weapons behave a little differently. In particular, as someone who prefers the non-lethal play style and relies on the MK22 for it, physics come into play and bullet drop is more severe, so you can’t easily send tranq darts into heads from long distances. Even at close range, you need to account for changes in trajectory. I went in thinking I could carry on running rings around enemies and putting them to sleep quickly, but found myself burning through ammo reserves and silencers due to the changes in gun behavior. The same goes for recoil on assault rifles and sway on the RPG during the escape sequence–careful where you’re firing those rockets.

The remaining differences come largely as quality-of-life tweaks. A new compass that is accessed from the equipment menu will pop up in the corner and point the way to the next objective when equipped; the life, stamina, and camo index have been moved to the bottom middle of the screen, freeing up the rest of it so you can soak in the visuals; the camo and face paint swap feature can be accessed through a shortcut assigned to the D-pad but uses pre-determined combinations, so there’s still value in going into the full menu and individually selecting your desired outfits. The codec can also be accessed through a D-pad shortcut, which makes getting to the save screen much easier, and you can also tune the radio to specific frequencies from the shortcut too. Finally, when enemies become suspicious or are alerted, an on-screen indicator where the enemy with eyes on you is located. You don’t get the last-chance shot from MGS5, so it’s mainly just a good way to improve situational awareness for the player and, if you’re quick enough, get out of sight.

There are other aspects of Delta that didn’t land for me. For some reason, Konami felt the need to re-record the Snake Eater vocal theme. Admittedly, I don’t dislike it–in fact, Cynthia Harrell’s vocal performance remains top notch–but it just feels… wrong. Again, a lot of that is because of my familiarity with the original and how jarring it is hearing a different version of it. However, it does throw the timing of the iconic ladder climb off slightly. And while the visuals are high-quality, there are moments where blemishes become far more noticeable. At times, there is artifacting around strands of hair when they’re up against certain backgrounds. Eva and The Boss can sometimes look like they’ve got a jumble of pixels stuck to the sides of their heads. And occasionally, there are stutters during cinematic sequences when a lot is going on, as the game lurches to get all the visuals and effects going after a cut.

But these are small idiosyncrasies in a game that has otherwise been made with a clear reverence for the source material. There has been a lot of toxicity around the Metal Gear Solid franchise for a while now, and some of that no doubt lingers and will color the sentiment around Delta. After all, Kojima isn’t involved in Delta and fans of Metal Gear Solid have a longstanding animosity toward Konami because of the high-profile break-up between the two parties, as well as the reported impact the dissolution of the relationship had on Metal Gear Solid 5.

However, it can’t be denied that Konami has done right by Metal Gear Solid 3 with Delta. There’s love put into the project and, at times, it feels like an appeal to fans from likeminded fans at the studio. It’s evident in the details that only longtime Metal Gear obsessives will appreciate: the fact that the game can be played in its original form with the new visuals through the Legacy control options; the various new camos from post-MGS3 titles that are available (though admittedly as DLC); the inclusion of extras such as the new secret theater; the food, camo, and model viewer, as well as Snake Vs. Monkey; or that the Guy Savage minigame, which has been omitted from various HD collections, making its return. It’s legitimately awesome in the new version, which is unsurprising since Platinum Games developed it.

Delta isn’t the first instance of Hideo Kojima’s beloved classic being updated and re-released, but it is the first complete rebuild of MGS3. It successfully modernizes visuals, tweaks game design, and updates controls so that the game sits comfortably alongside its action game contemporaries. From a content perspective, Konami has played it incredibly safe, using the same voice work and music, and leaving the story completely unaltered–effectively making Delta a one-to-one remake. But I can’t fault that, especially when I found myself once again enraptured by Snake’s tortuous mission to pull the world out of nuclear danger and fight for survival in a dangerous jungle. The impact of Konami’s efforts was such that, for eight hours, I wasn’t an adult yearning for the lost feelings that made me love Metal Gear Solid 3; I was the teenager living them for the first time again.



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Herdling
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While it’s one of, if not the oldest professions, herdsmen aren’t often represented in video game format, and after playing Okomotive’s Herdling, I struggle to understand why. Sure, if you asked me to come up with my dream game tomorrow, I probably wouldn’t start with “herding cattle”, but Herdling takes the idea and expands it into a mystical, uncanny world filled with fantastic beasts and terrifying foes.

Your role is simple: finding, taming, caring for, and guiding a herd of great calico-patterned horned beasts called Calicorns and ushering them to the mountain’s peak. Along the way, you’ll encounter various puzzles, obstacles, and foes.

Review info

Platform reviewed: Nintendo Switch 2
Available on: Nintendo Switch 2, PC, Xbox, and PS5
Release date: August 21, 2025

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From its painterly art style to its rich, emotive music, the world of Herdling is vivid and expansive, and delightful to explore thanks to a decent variety of mechanics in each level and plenty to discover and explore.

You’ll traverse verdant fields, discover abandoned man-made structures, both modern and mystical, and cross treacherous woods and mountain climes to reach the summit. While it’s not terribly long, offering 4-6 hours of gameplay, Herdling is littered with collectibles and discoverable content, making for a good amount of replayability.

Seen, but not herd

The game opens in a seemingly deserted city, as the protagonist awakens on the streets with a seemingly singular purpose: to find and herd Calicorns. This slightly claustrophobic cityscape acts as your tutorial ground, though there’s little to no instruction.

Things aren’t all as they seem, though; the presence of human life is tangible everywhere in the early stages of the game, whether that’s in trains hurtling past the open fields, lights flickering in buildings, or cars crossing open highways. Still, the manufactured world seems at odds with your new companions, so you dust off the concrete and head out into the open plains on your quest to reach the mountain’s peak, gathering more fluffy friends along the way.

It’s unclear why, bar the Calicorns, you seem to be so alone in this slightly uncanny world; Herdling asks not why, but how you’ll navigate the treacherous path to the summit. And that “how” is largely dictated by your herd.

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You’ll find a host of Calicorns along your journey, which you can tame with a good old-fashioned head scratch and name. By standing behind them and facing in the direction you want to travel in and waving your shepherd’s crook, you can steer your Calicorns and command them to stop, go, or slow down.

(Image credit: Okomotive)

You can also activate stampede mode for a speed boost, which is refuelled by guiding your herd over blue flowers and increases the more Calicorns you have tamed. Performance drops are fairly frequent during stampede mode, and as you’d expect, it becomes more challenging to guide your flock at high speeds.

In narrower portions of the map, navigation can be frustrating, especially as you collect more Calicorns, and there were more than a few moments where I feared I’d never safely negotiate the herd out of some slightly jammy corners. On the one hand, that could be by design, but I’m never a fan of chance taking the reins.

You’ll find yourself inventing all kinds of methods to keep your herd compact and controlled, but sometimes even pausing their motion can’t stop the scamps from going on walkabouts. After all, they are wild animals.

Your Calicorns aren’t your wards; they’re your companions, and help you as much as you do them! (Image credit: Okomotive)

Until you find your dream

The game is largely linear, but that doesn’t make your journey easy; you’ll have to decide on the best paths to take, navigate in and out of some tight spots with your growing, occasionally mischievous herd, and care for them to ensure they survive their passage – and yes, that does mean they can die.

Upon taking damage, the Calicorns’ vibrant coat, often dusted with petals from running amidst the flower fields and storing up stampede powers, will become slick with blood, a wound you can only heal by scrambling about the map level in search of berries to feed your friends. There is also an Immortal mode for the faint of heart; thankfully, in my first playthrough, I didn’t need it.

Nobody wants to ruin a perfect run with a herd member’s passing, but it’s doubly heartbreaking when you factor in how personable and cute these creatures are. Each has a unique design, with different horn shapes, sizes, and ages, expressed through their quizzical and expressive wide red eyes.

Some even have personality traits that play out as you rest in camp between levels. Needy Calicorns will follow you around camp until they receive affection, while playful ones will try to engage you in a game of fetch. It’s incredibly charming and raises the stakes in the game overall.

Image 1 of 4

(Image credit: Okomotive)(Image credit: Okomotive)(Image credit: Okomotive)(Image credit: Okomotive)

As the game progresses, the world expands to include more mysticism. Ancient monuments and grand structures become the backdrop for your quest, and the farther you climb, the more enchanting the world becomes; and the farther you feel from the vaguely post-apocalyptic vibes in the earlier game levels as your protagonist becomes increasingly enmeshed with their herd.

There are environmental threats at different levels, including spiky surfaces and even ice calving beneath your Calicorn’s feet (or hooves? You can’t really see them…), but the real fear factor comes from the cryptid-esque giant owls that seem to have a real taste for Calicorn.

These are the primary antagonists in Herdling, but their menace takes various forms. From high-stakes stealth navigation through the birds’ nest to high-speed chases as they snipe at you from the air, these great beasts pose a genuinely terrifying threat to your herd.

(Image credit: Okomotive)

You can really appreciate the calmer moments in the game in contrast to the terror, though. The great, sprawling landscapes are gorgeous, and the soft-touch sound design wonderfully captures the emotion of every moment. Activating stampede mode launches a tremendous Galop-esque burst of sound and color, where more peaceful moments feature little more than the sounds of nature and the sprinkling of keys.

Of course, as Herdling is an indie title, it does lack polish in areas; animations are occasionally a bit awkward, especially as Calicorns descend slopes, and tight or enclosed spaces can be challenging to navigate. That’s especially true as your herd grows, which may well be by design, but if you’re playing using a controller like I did on my Switch 2, you might find yourself in peril (or just fiddling with herd positioning) more often than you’d like, which can impact the pace of the game.

Still, I really enjoyed my time as a Calicorn shepherd. The game hints at themes of homeship, nature, found family, death, and rebirth, giving the player ample perspectives through which to enjoy its wordless narrative. Herdling cleverly implements its key herding mechanic but offers enough ways to play and explore that players of all ages and skillsets can enjoy this minimalist yet profound odyssey to find a new home.

(Image credit: Okomotive)

Should I play Herdling?

Play it if…

Don’t play it if…

Accessibility features

Herdling has a handful of dedicated accessibility settings. You can toggle controller vibration, sprint, auto-run, display HUD, herding direction indicator, Calicorn immortality, and button holds. There are no dialogue lines, but there are various language settings for the menus and tutorial.

How I reviewed Herdling

I played through Herdling twice (10 hours) on Nintendo Switch 2 using both the Pro Controller, Joy-Con 2, and handheld mode.

During my time with the game, I compared my experience with other indie titles, especially those launched on Switch 2, making certain to note any issues with performance or game quality.

First reviewed August 2025

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Herdling review | Rock Paper Shotgun
Game Reviews

Herdling review | Rock Paper Shotgun

by admin August 21, 2025


Herdling review
Another soaring piece of apocalyptic tourism from the makers of Far: Lone Sail, built around a novel set of herding mechanics the developers could have explored further.

  • Developer: Okomotive
  • Publisher: Panic
  • Release: August 8th 2025
  • On: Windows
  • From: Steam, Epic Games Store
  • Price: $20/£16/€19
  • Reviewed on: Intel Core-i7 12700F, 16GB RAM, Nvidia RTX 3060, Windows 11


Switzerland-based Okomotive are here to escape from dystopia once again. In their previous Far: Lone Sails and its sequel, you played a child operating a cutaway landship that often resembled a rampaging beast – the last surviving specimen of a race of monstrous engines, carrying you rightward through empty cities and petrified industry towards some kind of new beginning. Okomotive’s latest game Herdling flips the poles of the metaphor somewhat, even as it shifts to 3D movement: rather than a bestial machine, you’re driving a herd of intriguingly robotic “Calicorn” beasts to a promised land beyond the peaks.


The game starts with your character – another tenacious, faceless kid in red – waking up beneath a flyover and discovering the first of the Calicorns in an alleyway. You usher your hairy charges through desolate streets haunted by the roar of traffic, coming to a tourist billboard that shows some Calicorns gazing up at a mountain – this being your unspoken final destination.

The very end of the game and that billboard are basically the same thing, in that both seek to capitalise upon yearnings for a rustic, unpolluted Elsewhere. As a story about ‘getting back to nature’, I don’t think Herdling has much to say. It feels less sophisticated than Lone Sails, more straightforwardly utopian in its tale of an impoverished sprog and companion creatures retreating from the woebegone scrapyard of modernity. But as a study of human/animal relations and how they can be performed by game design, it’s sort of engrossing. Also, it has Okomotive’s usual captivating soundscape, and those mountains are certainly easy on the eyes.

Image credit: Panic / Rock Paper Shotgun


Sometimes when analysing a game, it’s helpful to start by forgetting all context. What is a herd, according to Herdling alone? It’s a single shape – a blob that stretches into a wedge during motion, and congeals into a rough oval when at rest. You stand behind the blob and wave your sorcerous shepherd’s staff to send a conduit of flowers through its heart, as though tracing a compass needle. The herd then moves in the direction of the line.


Scramble around the outside of the blob and wave your staff again to whistle it onto a different trajectory. Hold a button to make it move slower, when you’re navigating dangerous terrain. Slash it back and forth to have the blob power through denser undergrowth. Double-tap another button to stop the blob in place. Hammer and hold that button to have the blob knuckle down against gale-force winds – a brief challenge towards the end of the game.


Usefully, you do not shape and steer the blob in first-person. You’re given a third-person camera that gently pulls back into panorama when there’s something spectacular on the horizon. Without the convenience of that drone camera – so subtle in its shifts, so easy to take for granted – Herdling would be a much harder experience, and possibly a more intriguing one. You’d be part of the blob, down there in the stink and heave of bovine musculature, unable to scry the routes and obstacles.

Your Calicorns are branded blue, yellow and red, and these colours also suffuse the world and highlight its sparse spread of collectibles. Blue flowers fill up a gauge that allows you to channel the wind and initiate a stampede – whether for the sheer glee of it, or to force the herd up a slippery glacier. Red flowers initiate or prolong a stampede automatically: they’re Mario Kart speed pads. Yellow flowers pollinate fur with a painterly energy that can be vented to restore old murals, unlocking the path through certain ruins that plug into backstory dream visions of primordial Calicorns and their shepherds. The three primary colours repeat obsessively throughout those ruins, as though the geography itself were the hide of a Calicorn.

Image credit: Panic / Rock Paper Shotgun


Beyond the urban prologue, you’ll rescue a dozen other Calicorns along the route to that promised mountain. The “taming” process is necessarily streamlined: you might have to fetch a wounded Calicorn a health-restoring fruit to earn its trust, but mostly, you just walk up and do a QTE, as in the rather less cuddly Far Cry Primal. Then you get to name them. I named all mine after colleagues, which was very amusing until I ran out of colleagues and had to tunnel into Rock Paper Shotgun’s recent history of departures and layoffs.


The Calicorns come in all shapes and sizes. Some are built like Yorkshire terriers, bobbling along adorably on stumpy legs. Others are ponderous emperor penguins in cassocks. Some of the Calicorns have or acquire traits, such as “Brave” (that would be hardware editor James) and “Rascal” (that would be our old editor in chief Graham – RPS in peace).


Detailed in the pause menus, these behaviours didn’t make a huge impression on me during my review playthrough, even at periodic campfire intervals where the herd spreads out in a stagey way, and you can do things like hoik a ball to play fetch. You can also pet Calicorns, pull twigs and branches from their hides, and adorn them with the baubles and harnesses that litter the landscape. These last three actions don’t have any functional impact that I noticed: they’re simply an opportunity to express affection, a chance to bond with individual Calicorns.

Image credit: Panic / Rock Paper Shotgun


I can’t say I ever really bonded with my Calicorns. Partly, this was because I decorated them at random, according to my gamerbrain understanding that Thou Shalt Leave No Collectible Behind. By the end of Herdling – my playthrough lasted four hours – it was like leading a battalion of bellowing Christmas trees.


The wider complexity is that the game’s efforts to sell you on the individuality of Calicorns are at odds with the practical need to treat them as a blob, a tension I’d have loved Okomotive to do a lot more with. The major consequence of taming Calicorns is that the blob becomes harder to wield. Calicorns may bumble about a little, snagging on spiked scenery or breakable objects, even falling off cliffs at scripted intervals if you’re not watchful. It’s fiddly enough that you start to think twice about later additions. When I was deep in the woods, trying to navigate a labyrinth of smashable alarm totems and evade the fury of massive demon owls, I found myself regretting the addition of Ollie (our guides editor) to my herd, “Affectionate” though he may be.

The owls are Herdling’s antagonists, a predator population who, if I’m deciphering the wordless backstory correctly, have driven the Calicorn from their old stomping grounds. They are harrowing presences, their ivory masks glimmering in the mists, but they’re also, surely, stand-ins for the real villains of the piece: all those bloody humans who built the awful urban junk you’re journeying away from.

That last observation falls flat, of course, because in Herdling you are playing a human, presiding over nonhuman animal lives in what is at least partly a self-serving fashion. Caretaking responsibilities aside, you periodically require the Calicorns to shove boulders and trunks out of the path. They also willingly serve as platforms when you need to scale a ledge and complete a very simple terrain puzzle – handy, given that you don’t have a jump button. In this way, Herdling explores a desire to be intimate with other creatures while also using them.

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The game’s real shepherd could be its score, another surging collection of heart-inflating orchestral tracks from composer Joel Schoch. As in Far: Lone Sails, this as much an album as a videogame, which explains the tight running length: the snow-blown hills and escarpments often feel secondary, structured around the peaks and troughs of the music.

The invisible orchestra is another kind of herd that mirrors the one you drive before you – sometimes devolving to individual performers when your beasts are scattered, only to gather itself furiously when the Calicorns are in full flight. It’s a lovely audible modelling of a disorderly group of beings in motion. It’s also an audible expression of your power over those beings and the limits of their simulated autonomy.



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Kinsta review | TechRadar

by admin August 21, 2025



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When it comes to best web hosting and website management, there is no shortage of options. The vast majority of companies out there offer affordable services that are good enough to get the job done. For us, Kinsta is the stand-out choice for hosting for agencies.

Kinsta is a cloud-based hosting solution providing services for WordPress websites, web applications, databases, and static sites. They provide access to high-performance servers and features such as staging environments, automatic backups, enterprise-level Cloudflare integration, and more.

Kinsta also includes quality security features such as DDoS protection, SSL certificate with wildcard support, and malware scanning and removal.

    Kinsta subscription options:

  • 12 month plan – $284 per month ($3,408 total cost)

From the main website, you can access Kinsta’s official blog. It’s easy on the eye and filled with a myriad of articles, most of which are related to WordPress and software development. In addition to this, Kinsta offers a fresh and video-packed YouTube channel and relatively active presence on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook.

(Image credit: Future)

Kinsta features

Kinsta offers high-end CPUs, as well as global availability thanks to Google’s C2 and C3D machines on its premium tier network. By using these top-of-the-line CPUs, you are guaranteed that your website will be up and running faster than ever before.

To further improve the speed of your website, Kinsta also offers a global content delivery network with over 260 locations around the world. This allows Kinsta to deliver fast pages and serve cached assets from your visitors’ closest location.

Kinsta also comes with built-in application performance monitoring (APM), which is its custom-designed performance monitoring tool specifically for WordPress sites. We used this feature to identify any potential issues or bottlenecks slowing down our site during our test of the hosting service.

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Kinsta’s DevKinsata feature provides a comprehensive development environment that makes it easy to develop applications locally on your computer. DevKinsata includes many helpful features such as version control which allows developers to roll back to previous versions of their code if needed, easy debugging capabilities with Xdebug integration, and deployments to production servers with just one click.

With the new Kinsta Cloudflare integration, we took advantage of a wildcard SSL certificate which let us secure our subdomains with just one certificate. A wildcard SSL is an SSL certificate that secures both a root domain and its individual subdomains. This is in contrast to other types of certificates that require you to list each individual subdomain on the certificate.

As part of its Cloudflare integration, Kinsta offers customers a unique benefit – reserved IP addresses. Reserved IPs are unique IP addresses assigned to each Kinsta customer site. These IP addresses are reserved exclusively for use by that specific customer and ensure that the DNS A-record IP address will not be shared by other sites on Cloudflare’s network. In some cases, this can cause problems if a service blocks a spam site that happens to share the same Cloudflare IP address as your site.

We were also impressed with the Kinsta Brotli Compression Tool (a lossless compression format that is supported by all major browsers and achieves better compression ratios than gzip).

Kinsta also released a tool called Edge Caching. This is an incredibly powerful tool for websites running WordPress that can significantly reduce the amount of time it takes to serve cached HTML to site visitors. Edge Caching is included free with all Kinsta plans, and no additional plugins are required.

Kinsta’s Edge Caching works by saving your website/page cache to Cloudflare’s global network of over 260 data centers. When site visitors load your website, cached responses will be delivered from the location closest to them, helping to reduce latency and ensure faster loading times.

With the help of the Early Hints, you can further improve site speed. Early hints is a modern web standard that defines a new 103 HTTP status code. Enabling this web standard on your site, it gives your site visitors’ browsers the chance to download certain resources in advance or in parallel with others. This results in a faster page rendering speed.

A curiosity of Kinsta’s hosting, but one that we found made sense, is the apparent lack of a temporary URL for checking the site runs accurately. However, this is a feature that can be easily turned on and off, and lasts for around 60 minutes when enabled. Given that a site doesn’t need to be seen by the public or crawlers before launch, this is useful.

For web hosting services in Australia, Kinsta CDN is in six Australian cities, including Adelaide, Brisbane, Canberra, Melbourne, Perth, and Sydney.

(Image credit: Future)

Is Kinsta easy to use? 

We find Kinsta easy to use – from signing up to navigating through the dashboard. The web host provides you with an intuitive dashboard that makes hosting your website easy. The dashboard let us quickly access all the features and settings in one place, which makes it simple to manage our website’s performance and security.

With Kinsta, you can also set up and manage multiple websites from one account, as well as deploy applications, databases or static sites, meaning you don’t have to switch between different accounts every time you want to make changes or update your site or create a new web app.

Kinsta also has a number of helpful features that make managing your website easier. All these features are designed so that even those who aren’t tech-savvy can easily manage their website without too much hassle.

As a fully managed WordPress hosting provider, Kinsta’s prices are higher than other web hosts (Image credit: Future)

Kinsta plans and pricing

Kinsta offers different plans, ranging from $35/month to $1700/month. All plans include free wildcard SSL, CDN, staging, and unlimited migrations. But what do you get when you purchase one of these plans? The Single plans starts at $35/month and allows you to install 1 WordPress, 10 GB of storage space, 125 GB free CDN, and 35,000 visits per month. The Single-site plans scale with each step up getting more site visits, storage, and CDN bandwidth. Each Single site plan denotes the support amount of visits. The plans go as high as 1,250,000+ visits, 15 GB+ storage and 1000GB CDN bandwidth.

Multiple-site plans support multiple WordPress installs. Each plan name denotes the amount of WordPress installs supported. Each multiple-site plan supports multisite network and site cloning. For WP 2 ($70/mo) you get two WordPress installs, with 70,000 visits, 250 GB of CDN bandwidth, and 20 GB storage. As the plans increase in price the resources, site visits, and amount of WordPress installs increase too. The WP 40 plan ($450/mo) supports 40 WordPress installs, 60 GB storage, 1500 GB of CDN, and 75,000 monthly visits.

Kinsta also offers an Enterprise Plan for multiple sites, which starts at $675/month and includes 60+ WordPress installs, 100+ GB of space, 1,250,000+ visits, and a 30-day backup retention.

All the above plans come with unlimited free migrations and a 30-day money-back guarantee, so if you are not satisfied with the service, you can request a refund. Select plans on Single and Multiple-site tiers also include a one month free trial.

Agency Hosting

Kinsta’s Agency program is targeted, price-wise, at established digital agencies. The Agency 20 plan, which we tested, offers support for 20 WordPress installs, so potentially 20 clients. It also includes an extra site, for your agency. 500,000 visits, 50GB of storage, and 1,000GB CDN storage makes this an attractive starting point, but Agency 40 ($375/month with annual billing) and Agency 60 ($563/month under the same terms) are also available, with corresponding increases in installs.

These plans also include a white label provision, removing the Kinsta branding for reselling the hosting to the client, and access to beta tools. Backups, advanced caching, and migrations are also included with these packages, along with that all-important developer support. A number of tools are available here, from easy site cloning to Git integration and access to the Kinsta API.

We used GTmetrix to measure the uptime and response time of our Kinsta site (Image credit: GTmetrix)

Kinsta speed and experience

Kinsta argues that it is almost a certainty that users will see “faster page load times, along with back-end (WordPress dashboard) speed” when hosting with them. Faster than what, we asked ourselves. Faster than the average speed, faster than lightning or faster than Superman?

In any case, GTmetrix (a tool we used to test the speed performance of Kinsta’s main website) appears to agree with them given that it rated the performance of their website with an A (91%), which is not a result we often see. All major core metrics related to the speed were above the average, which looks pretty promising.

When it comes to uptime, Kinsta’s technical team monitors all of its users’ websites at all times, which means that they will be notified if any downtime occurs and lasts longer than five minutes, and, thus, prompt them to rush to resolve the issue. After monitoring Kinsta’s main website for a month using UptimeRobot, we couldn’t find a single trace of downtime, which does inspire confidence.

Latest results

We recently ran more tests on Kinsta for our best hosting for agencies guide. We did the same test we do for every host. We migrate a simple website and perform some baseline WordPress benchmark test and do some Siege testing for concurrent visitors. We used the Agency 20 plan. While these don’t show what the server is like under load. It does show a good baseline score for site performance.

Swipe to scroll horizontallyWordPress benchmark

Performance metric

Result

Operations with large text data

6.68

Random binary data operations

8.24

Recursive mathematical calculations

7.32

Iterative mathematical calculations

8.63

Filesystem

Row 5 – Cell 1

Filesystem write ability

9.71

Local file copy and access speed

9.56

Small file IO test

10

Database

Row 9 – Cell 1

Importing large amount of data to database

9.23

Simple queries on single table

9.88

Complex database queries on multiple tables

8.23

Object cache

Row 13 – Cell 1

Persistent object cache enabled

0

Network

Row 15 – Cell 1

Network download speed test

10

Server score

8.1

Swipe to scroll horizontallySiege

Performance metric

5 concurrent visitors

9 concurrent visitors

Transactions

8484

13580

Availability

96.37

96.36

Elapsed time

299.43

299.19

Data transferred

91.72

145.90

Response time

0.17

0.18

Transaction rate

28.33

45.39

Throughput

0.31

0.49

Concurrency

4.87

8.11

Successful transactions

8164

13068

Longest transaction

1.33

39.76

Failed transactions

320

513

Shortest transaction

0.09

0.08

Kinsta security

Kinsta is one such provider that offers quality security measures (in our opinion) including SSL (Secure Sockets Layer) certificates. An SSL certificate is a type of digital certificate that provides encryption and authentication for data sent over the internet. It helps protect user information, like credit card numbers and passwords, from being accessed by malicious third parties.

An SSL certificate also helps verify the identity of a website so that users know they are connecting to the correct server and not a malicious one.

Kinsta uses Cloudflare’s infrastructure to provide wildcard SSL certificates with 128-bit or higher encryption as well as 2048-bit RSA keys. Kinsta says its servers are also constantly monitored 24/7 for any signs of suspicious activity or hacking, which is good to know. Kinsta also offers a 99.9% SLA-backed uptime guarantee.

There’s also a Malware Security Pledge in which Kinsta’s team will help restore a site in the event of an attack. Kinsta have earned SOC 2 and ISO 27001 compliance so security standards are high and hopefully you’ll never have to use that.

You’ll find plenty of how-to guides in Kinsta’s knowledgebase (Image credit: Future)

Customer support

Kinsta offers knowledgeable sales representatives who can help you find the hosting plan that best fits your website or project.

If you want a deeper dive into all of Kinsta’s features, consider scheduling a personalized demo with one of its experts. This is an excellent way to get familiar with Kinsta’s powerful dashboard and hosting features, as well as ask any questions that come up during the process.

We had a few questions about our website and contacted Kinsta through its question form on the website. They got back to us the next day with answers tailored specifically to our hosting dilemma.

Kinsta’s support team is available 24/7/365 via live chat in the MyKinsta dashboard so that you can quickly receive help. You can also open up tickets here if there are ever any issues with your site.

As noted, we also tried Kinsta’s Agency 20 plan, arranging for a site to be migrated via a backup. The support operative who took ownership of this task completed it within a couple of hours, a timescale that included not just scanning the ZIP file for potential issues, but also fully migrating it and testing the site.

We later ran into an issue trying to point a domain at the hosting. This requires a bit more clicking and settings configuration than with other hosts (switching nameservers is just one aspect of this), but while I found this baffling at first, the support team member who walked me through it helped me solve it within 15 minutes.

Kinsta also offers free webinars to its customers (Image credit: Future)

There are more than a few self-help options including regularly updated documentation, free e-books, free webinars, a newsletter and a blog we mentioned before, and everything is dedicated to bringing knowledge about WordPress to its users. In addition to this, Kinsta’s YouTube channel is filled with step-by-step guides and the new ones are coming out on a week-to-week basis at the very least.

As an alternative, you can reach Kinsta’s “timely and knowledgeable” support via email and chat.

Kinsta alternatives

Much like Kinsta, Flywheel is a fellow US-based host specialized in “top-of-the-line” managed WordPress hosting solutions. Both of them strive to be beginner-friendly, offer well-rounded, feature-packed packages and are on the high-priced side of the spectrum. However, Kinsta’s least expensive solution starts at a whopping $30, half as much as what is offered by Flywheel. Therefore, if the price is the key criterion (since both hosts are competent) for you, you could save some bucks by going with Flywheel.

Bluehost is one of the most popular hosting options on the market today, even when it comes to managed WordPress hosting. In comparison with Kinsta, Bluehost has a myriad of hosting types and options besides WordPress and its WordPress plans are well-structured and suitable for newcomers. If you are, however, looking for premium managed WordPress options, you might find yourself at home with Kinsta.

DreamHost is a US-based provider supplying WordPress-optimized hosting solutions and related services, including a domain registration, which is something you won’t get with Kinsta. Another thing they don’t provide is a website builder and you’ll have that as an option with DreamHost. What is more, in addition to offering more hosting options, DreamHost has more pocket-friendly plans, so you’ll save some money as well.

Although HostGator does not specialize in WordPress hosting, it has a few rather attractive solutions on the offer. Nonetheless, if you are looking for a premium fully managed WordPress hosting (and you are ready to shell out the money) Kinsta might be a better pick. If you would rather have something simpler and more on the affordable side, HostGator is an excellent choice.

WP Engine is also a great alternative as it offers a wide range of services, from shared hosting to managed WordPress hosting and dedicated servers. WP Engine is known for its fast speeds and reliable uptime, as well as its excellent customer service and support team.

SiteGround is another great option if you’re looking for an alternative to Kinsta. This provider offers a variety of hosting plans that range from shared hosting to VPS and cloud solutions. SiteGround also has excellent customer service and support, which makes it a great choice if you need help getting started or have questions about how to use their services.

Is Kinsta right for you? 

Kinsta offers a range of features to help businesses get up and running quickly and easily, including easy scalability, managed updates, automated daily backups, and 24/7 support.

Kinsta offers a range of features to help businesses get up and running quickly and easily, including automatic scaling, managed updates, automated daily backups,SSH access, WP CLI, a powerful API, Application Performance Monitoring, and 24/7/365 support in 10 languages, with a response time within a minute and 98% client satisfaction.

Kinsta also prides itself on its performance and reliability – It’s caching technology ensures websites load faster than ever before; this helps keep visitors on your site longer which can lead to increased conversions.

Kinsta FAQs

Is Kinsta only for WordPress?

No! While Kinsta is an excellent choice for WordPress websites, that’s not all it can do. It also supports static sites, application hosting, and database hosting.

Do I need a security plugin with Kinsta?

No – and that’s one of the many advantages of using Kinsta hosting. The security at Kinsta is built into the platform itself; all accounts are automatically scanned daily for malicious code and activity and protected with regular backups as well as enterprise-grade DDOS protection.

Plus, every account includes free SSL/TLS encryption to protect your data in transit.



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Discounty Review - Long Live The Empire
Game Reviews

Discounty Review – Long Live The Empire

by admin August 21, 2025



In the aftermath of Stardew Valley’s success and popularity, there have been many attempts by other developers to carve their own piece of the pixel farm life simulator pie. Whereas those games so often put you in the role of a poor farmer or some other position of struggle, Discounty does the opposite, having you effectively play as the bad guys in Stardew Valley: the outsider that has everything and is trying to weasel into the community. You’re not literally playing a mirror of that game’s story, but it’s awfully close–instead of being the new farmer in a small, struggling town, you’re instead the new owner of the big-brand supermarket that’s attempting to monopolize the economy and push out existing vendors to increase your profit margins. It altogether makes for a game that is fun to play (in that hypnotic sort of way that’s recognizable in so many games that romanticize retail work), but it is ultimately narratively quite uncomfortable at times and too muddled in its storytelling to utilize that discomfort to deliver a compelling message.

Granted, you’re merely the pawn in the palm of the hand of a much greedier capitalist: your aunt. Roped into moving to her small harbor town of Blomkest to help out with her struggling market, you arrive to find she’s sold out to the Discounty chain and rebranded. Your aunt is immediately portrayed as a suspicious person, keeping secrets locked away in sheds, making backroom deals with banks, and firing employees without a second thought. It’s all in the name of expanding her supermarket business empire, and you’re her most loyal pawn, charming locals into going along with your expansions and acquiring their wares so that citizens have to go to Discounty to buy food and home supplies.

And Jordan wept, for there were no more worlds to conquer.

It feels scummy, especially since your character has zero backbone, pushing the buck on responsibility and ignoring the consequences of their actions for a big chunk of the game’s story, which primarily deals with a hurting community that needs healing.

Discounty comes very close to tackling this story in a nuanced and measured way. An unfair and demanding boss puts you immediately on the backfoot, creating the implication that you’re powerless. And as the sole employee for most of the story, you have to handle all of the store’s responsibilities solo for six days a week, eight hours a day. That leaves you precious little free time to actually go out and talk to people and try to help them with their problems. At face value, it appears as if Discounty is presenting the viewpoint of an overworked and underpaid retail worker not having the bandwidth to address societal problems–a fairly accurate reflection of a lot of people in real life day-to-day. It’s hard to dismantle the machine when you’re an unwilling cog caught up in its design.

The protagonist isn’t characterized that way though; instead, they’re propped up as the savior that Blomkest’s economy needs. You decide the fate of these people, and you willingly go against their wants in the name of capitalism. The story tries to make you feel bad about this a few times (which in itself is annoying, as there’s no choice to not make the decisions that you’re being condemned for), with citizens coming into your store and expressing their displeasure at your prices, monopolization of the economy, and willingness to destroy existing infrastructure and town history in the name of expanding the size of your store. But they immediately forgive you and go back to regularly shopping with you the very next day, draining any sort of narrative consequence from your actions.

When first starting out, you have to add everything up by hand and it’s so SLOW.

So often, Discounty feels like it’s on the verge of making a point about this–the game almost delves into the subject of how, in the grand scheme of things, we bemoan large corporations and big-name brands but then are all too quick to rely on them. But it’s so muddled by the game’s insistence to constantly divert attention away from this subject matter. It wants to be a “cozy” game, and dealing with nuanced issues that make you think aren’t cozy. Pretty much every story beat is shuffled under the rug as soon as it’s brought up, creating spikes in tone that ricochet between outlandish silliness and discomforting reality, and don’t allow space for the player to sit with any of what they learned because there are shelves to stock. Discounty has a barebones narrative framework that leaves you wanting for an answer that the story feels ill-equipped to give because it accidentally stumbled into asking the question.

These hang-ups with the story aside, the moment-to-moment gameplay of Discounty is pretty fun. Most of it sees you frantically running around your own store to keep shelves stocked or take payment at the cash register. As your business grows, new challenges arise. Customers can track in dirt that you need to take time to clean, for example, and as your stock grows, finding enough space for all your shelving can prove a challenging puzzle. But finding solutions to these problems in the constant drive to push efficiency and customer satisfaction are regularly rewarding. With each shift, you’ll notice shortcomings you can shore up or places where you can improve, and with careful consideration (and the profits you earn), you can put your plans into action.

Lots of businesses in town serve multiple purposes given everyone’s dire situation, like the hardware store doubling as the dump.

Need more customers coming in to buy the surplus of cabbage you accidentally ordered? Buy an eye-catching prop that will compel more people to add cabbage to their grocery lists and print out some flyers to plaster around town to drive up the number of people who visit in the coming week. Discover that dirt keeps piling up next to the milk? Shift your shelves around so that there are two avenues to reach your milk section, lessening the traffic through the formerly singular lane, and then move the cleaning supplies next to the milk section so you can easily grab them. Struggling to add up customer’s large orders even with the built in calculator and stressing about how often people complain about the speed of service? Invest in a scanner that cuts out the need to add up the individual price of each item.

As Discounty’s story continues, you’ll unlock more challenges, like daily and weekly quotas that net you a bonus currency to unlock new items to stock the store with. You’ll have story-driven milestones to accomplish the likes of raising a huge sum to afford another expansion or finding a way to make a deal with several suppliers to grow your business. The chase to achieve these goals becomes the driving force in Discounty, and even if the narrative payoff for these tasks is hit-or-miss each time, the sensation of hitting another milestone and checking off a job on your to-do list is regularly fulfilling. Discounty grades your performance each day as well, so the act of simply streamlining your business to make it even more productive than it was the day before is gratifying too and creates smaller milestones that you can pursue between the larger goals that typically take several in-game weeks to work toward.

You will buy so many shelves in a playthrough, single-handedly propping up this poor man’s whole business.

When you’re not working in the store, you’re free to explore the town and talk to its various citizens. Each has a memorable personality and design, setting a high standard on first meeting that the game doesn’t always meet in subsequent interactions. Outside of specific story beats, each citizen only has a handful of things to say, so speaking to them three or four times can exhaust all their dialogue and cause them to start repeating earlier conversations. This can get annoying, especially with the citizens that you have to speak to dozens of times because they’re shop vendors that you buy furniture from or suppliers that you obtain special goods from–clicking through the same dialogue chains over and over becomes grating quickly.

Talking to the other characters can push forward other plot points too, including a few that center around mysterious happenings that plague the town. Why are the woods closed and covered in a strange purple mist? What’s up with the huge population of rats congregating in random parts around town? What is your aunt keeping in the locked shed and why does she keep saying that you don’t have to worry about it? These mysteries are largely character-driven, and the reward for your sleuthing is learning more about the denizens that call Blomkest their home. They aren’t all that challenging to puzzle through, with the clue needed to proceed usually falling into your lap just by putting time into the store. But they’re all fun distractions and get you more involved with the colorful cast of characters, making solving each mystery far more worthwhile than just going up to people and trying to talk to them normally.

The characters in Discounty are really fun! It’s a shame they often have so little to say.

With some caveats, I’d recommend Discounty. The story will make you regularly feel like you’re the bad guy in all this, and technically you are even if it’s no fault of your own. But it’s easy to ignore the riffraff and the trouble you’re causing your fellow citizens in your constant pursuit of bringing a factory-level of efficiency to your growing supermarket, and driving up profits for the sole purpose of buying upgrades that will let you drive profits even further. Maybe Stardew Valley’s JojaMart had the right idea after all.



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The Dark Queen Of Mortholme review
Game Reviews

The Dark Queen Of Mortholme review

by admin August 21, 2025


The Dark Queen Of Mortholme review

This “short-form, second-person indie” where you play the final boss tells a more traditional and restrained story that its premise might suggest, but it’s still a worthwhile and thoughtful micro-treatise on storytelling, curiosity, stagnation, and heroism.

  • Developer: Mosu
  • Publisher: Monster Theater
  • Release: Out now
  • On: Windows
  • From: Steam/GOG/Itch.io
  • Price: £5 /€6 /$6
  • Reviewed on: Intel Core i5-12600K, 32GB RAM, Nvidia RTX 4060 Ti, Windows 11

There’s a beautiful, wordless moment about ten minutes in to The Dark Queen Of Mortholme. As the titular queen, you’ve just casually mace-flattened the same plucky interloper for the Nth time, then snapped their corpse out of existence in a wreath of electric purple fire with all the ceremony of clearing toast crumbs from a bench.

Watch on YouTube

Each time, just as the queen is about to plonk herself back down on her throne, the hero galumphs trumpetously back through the doorway for another pop. Here’s our premise: both an inversion of Soulsian conventions and a wry tribute, in the way all inversions are. And who hasn’t considered how maddeningly Sisyphean it must feel to be on the receiving end of such smug under-doggedness? “Struggle in the face of overwhelming odds”. “Testament to the persistence of the human spirit”. Mate. You are fucking immortal.

We’ve felt the queen’s frustration grow, forced to consider the toll imposed by folklorish infamy on the actual person behind the myth (every time I try to let my hair down some wanker tries to climb up it, says Rapunzel). But on this occasion, something has changed. The hero is late. And there’s an unmistakable hint of longing as the queen looks toward the door. It’s not completely clear if she’s starting to, y’know, actually enjoy all this. But there is both simple truth and stark tragedy in it: unchallenged dominance must feel unbearably stagnant after the initial high wears off. You eat the same soup daily for decades, you might find yourself oddly fond of the fly that decides to one day show up for swimming lessons.

The hero stands completely still during the first fight, and so falls easily to a lazy, disdainful mace swipe. They soon decide that moving is probably a good idea. So, you get a few new moves: a gap-closing spike, and a devastating magic fire that telegraphs its arrival, sportsmanlike as all supermoves should be.

Image credit: Mosu/Rock Paper Shotgun

So, of course, the hero works out how to deal with each move in turn. Later, an achievement pops named “out of tricks?” for using each of the queen’s attacks. A trophy that feels like a admission of defeat – a perfect use of digital paraphernalia as storytelling device I wish was more common. Through these warnings of stagnation, glimpses of potential growth present themselves; dialogue options that offer curiosity or dismissiveness. We soon learn the queen doesn’t even know the layout of her own castle. If she did, she might have done a better job of hiding all those treasure chests.

But no, and so the hero returns with chainmail. Then a shortbow. Then a glowing sword and, for the first time, removes the entirety of one of the queen’s four health bar segments. And I realise, then, that they’re going to win eventually. Bloodstains build up until they coat the floor, but my moves are the same each time. The queen, unchallenged, has been given no reason to stay curious, and so has become stagnant. And now, faced for the first time with something that might inspire her to leave and learn some fancier footwork, she’s probably going to die here. Bloody typical, really: a real reason to change showing up just as it becomes too late to do so.

A boss fight demands a theme, and the music here is all apocalyptic organ pipes, rasping with grandeur and nightmares. Somewhere buried in the mix is a toybox melodica; deeply annoying in the way its plastic honking demands focus as soon as I notice it. That’s the hero, I decide, and I think this is the first time I’ve found myself seriously thinking about boss themes; are they meant to celebrate the grandeur and spectacle of the boss, or the struggle of the hero? The best, I think, do both and neither. Odes not to individuals, but to the moment. The dance.

Image credit: Mosu/Rock Paper Shotgun

That bastard melodica aside, I have two large problems with The Dark Queen Of Mortholme, an otherwise thumbs-up worthwhile distraction that wastes not a second of runtime in its crushingly inevitable set-up and and crescendo. The first is a line from the queen about halfway through. Something to the tune of “against the might of the status quo, your actions don’t matter”. Ending Explained, you dumb baby! Less on the nose than “got your nose”, honestly.

And the other is not actually in the game, but on the game’s Steam page. “Experience a (macabre, short-form), second-person indie” – immediately relegating the queen to the status of camera lens, of supporting role. You may notice that these two things share a common thread: they both insist on telling me how I’m supposed to feel about a story short enough to offer ample time for self reflection on the average lunchbreak.

But, hey, I can respect it. It’s not my story, after all. Deeply unpopular take maybe, but an artist’s work belongs to them, I’m just visiting. I can’t begrudge the nudges too hard, bumpy as they are. Still, I’m compelled to offer a read in the form of a deeply self-indulgent anecdote. Although, if you want a quick verdict, only interesting games inspire deeply self-indulgent anecdotes, yes.

Image credit: Mosu/Rock Paper Shotgun

A writer and person I have a great deal of respect for on both counts once told me, over a plate of stone-cold fried calamari on a pleasant Los Angeles evening I would soon make less pleasant through a callow and selfish acquiescence to my own need to get embarrassingly obliterated in even the most casual of social situations (thus fulfilling my cliched tourist understanding of the average way an LA evening unfolds), that they had become disillusioned with the power of stories to enact meaningful change in the world. I fell back on a pop-science factoid I’m fond of – that of perceptual filling-in. So much is blur and chaos. Dry and tangled, and we cannot live without the artifice of beginnings, middles, and ends. The motivation and the obstacles. The reasons for going along with this chaotic mess in the first place.

Stories can’t lose their power because they’re the fuel, the driver. I cannot remember what they said next, because I am a ridiculous prick who often forgets to listen to other people when I am too busy waiting for their approval at my having said something I believe to be insightful. I am convinced to this day that if I’d have just listened, I’d have a more more nuanced view on these things that I currently do. Maybe they would have disabused me of this notion completely, but it’s one I still hold: stories are all we’ve got, and good stories from elsewhere are the only thing powerful enough to change how we see the stories that are assigned to us.

At least, that’s the story I tell myself. The story the Dark Queen Of Mortholme tells is one where the hero still gets all the best lines. In this, it’s quite traditional, despite its novel framing. The queen’s real tragedy, as with so many characters that threaten to break convention, is that whatever she does, she’s still trapped in a story. And, either through aims or just convention, it’s someone else’s story at that.

“Perhaps it would be a mercy,” muses the queen on the possibility of the hero’s defeat and surrender. “To be relieved of the burden of trying?”, the hero replies. “No thanks!” (Princess!)

Sounds good, right? And I love it, honestly. It made me feel like fighting. But god, if anything could convince you that, really, there are no new stories, then what better than a game that presents itself as subversion, and ends up in exactly the same place as everything else.



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